Friction is the proof it's working

Consider what happens when you stop handing people answers, and whether the discomfort that follows is a problem to solve or a sign you're doing something right.

We were in a meeting last week and I asked a straightforward question: what’s the right decision here?

The answer I got was not an answer. It was a reference. “That’s always been the direction.”

I asked again. Same response, different words. The direction has been this. The direction has always pointed here. I pushed a third time, more directly now, and got the same thing dressed up slightly differently. At some point I raised my voice — not out of anger at the person, but because I needed the whole room to hear what I was about to say.

“That’s exactly what we’re trying to move away from. That mindset that paralyzes us because no one wants to be held accountable and make a decision. I need you to make decisions, to move us forward, and to take responsibility for the consequences.”

The room got quiet in the way rooms do when something true has been said out loud.

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